Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
