If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
Randomize
