don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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