If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
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