I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
Randomize