I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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