Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
