he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
Im part way to drunk.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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