You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Randomize
