I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Randomize
