Buhtt sex?
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Randomize
