just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
Randomize
