Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
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