Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Randomize
