I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
I would ride that face into the sunset
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize
