Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
Randomize
