youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Randomize
