We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
Randomize