An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
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