Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
We have started to decorate penises.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
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