Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
Randomize
