Buhtt sex?
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Randomize
