Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
I think i ate a live goldfish last night. that i caught with my hand in a kiddie pool. my stomach really hurts.
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
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