When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.
I want to be a cop.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
