Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
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