You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize