And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
