Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
