thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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