I look better un-naked...
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
my shit smells like andre
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Randomize
