Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
