Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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