WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
two words: eviction party
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
