If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
you win again, gameday.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
Sorry about my life...
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize