I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
tell me about the eggs
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