i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
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