I don't think brook has ever known best
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Randomize
