she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
should my penis look like a turkey
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Randomize
