is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Even my vagina gasped.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
