Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
apparently the secret to your success is patron
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
Randomize
