This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
Randomize
