Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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