if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
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