none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
