You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
Randomize
