But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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