got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
