so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
Is it because I queefed?
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Randomize