I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
Randomize
