i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
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