I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
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