I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Randomize